by Rich Moreland, April 2018
In this final post on Sofie Marie, we’ll look at her on-screen adventures.
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For Sofie Marie, her swinging history prompted her move to porn. I’ve interviewed other girls with similar experiences as swingers and wanted to know what Sofie could tell us.
A Hall Pass
“I am doing porn because of swinging or ‘the lifestyle’ (as it is known among its adherents). I am a true Hotwife which means I have a hall pass from my husband to go and explore whatever I want to as long as I am one hundred percent open about my plans and experiences with him. He likes to see and hear about my exploits from me and from Spike,” Sofie says.
From what I’ve learned as a journalist, being absolutely open about everything is the cornerstone of acceptance into the swinging community and the ongoing enjoyment of it.
Sofie’s interview with Adult DVD Talk gives us the back story. Her husband introduced his new wife (they’ve only been married for a couple of years) to the swinger community. “He told me about it and I didn’t have any idea what a ‘swinger’ was,” she tells Captain Jack.
Now husband and wife savor the lifestyle together which means parties and the excitement of hooking up in a consensual atmosphere. Sofie has loved it all, especially the variety of sex partners-in-waiting, an unexpected treat for her.
“We’ve met a lot of great people and I have been with girls through that. That’s where it all began as far as fooling around with other girls,” she beams.
That ongoing adventure of self-discovery became an important step in initiating a porn career.
Sexy Young Guys
Sex for the camera is another story.
Sofie’s photography career began with bikini modeling which, as sometimes happens with porn girls, led to nude work. From there, her exhibitionist tendencies and relishing all things sexual nudged Sofie to take the next logical step: her own website and porn.
Sofie explains to Captain Jack that x-rated shooting is “no big deal” because she enjoys exploring her “sexual boundaries” which includes, no surprise, being naked and revealing her “girl parts.”
Has porn benefited Sofie’s free-wheeling spirit? You bet.
“I have gotten really comfortable in front of the camera. So, being nude or having sex is easy for me with the camera rolling,” she says.
“I am really a shy person and exploring my sexuality and now doing porn has been a great experience.”
From a psychological perspective, exhibitionism is a common trait among porn performers and often counteracts shyness. Sofie’s fans are undoubtedly thankful she has made it work for her.
By the way, Sofie’s age would dictate a career as a MILF, but she’s not really into that. When it comes to shooting, “It’s the job for me to play the MILF,” she comments, “but I like playing the Hotwife better.”
Actually, being a MILF took some getting used to, Sofie declares, because she not a mom in her real life, so the label feels a bit “weird” to her. But it does have its rewards. “I get to have sex with the young sexy guys as a MILF so that’s a bonus for me!”
That’s something all her fans can watch with delight as Sofie redefines “cougar!”
There is something about Sofie Marie that separates her out from the run-of-the-mill porn girl. Though I’ve not had the pleasure of being on one of her sets, as I’ve said, I can infer from the short clips I’ve seen that she is cultivating an image that sets her apart from the crowd.
That is a huge reason for her popularity, I believe.
In talking with performers and directors I’ve been reminded that porn sex is not the type of sex civilians (pornspeak for non-industry people) experience in their everyday lives. What is surprising is this: that goes for porn performers as well who are happy to separate film sex from home sex.
Another way of putting it is this: porn sex is acrobatics that involve contortions and positions that directors insist be held minute after minute to get the footage desired.
As you might expect, performers don’t go home in the evening to their significant others and hang from the chandeliers. Work sex is a business and exhausting enough as it is.
Social scientists and educators tell us that porn, with all its outre positions and hard banging, has become the new sex education for today’s young people.
Sometimes it’s difficult for them to understand that sex is supposed to be enjoyable, intimate, and a mutually shared experience. It doesn’t need to be nasty, rough, or vulgar and doesn’t have to be dominated by deep throating, gagging, choking, tears that smear mascara, and reverse cowgirls (the most graphic position for the camera).
Here is what I mean. Watch Sofie in a girl-on-boy oral scene, for example, and compare her with popular porn performers today. The difference is noteworthy.
Her on-screen sex is instinctive and unpretentious. Without doubt, this is Sofie Marie’s tour de force and why she is destined to luxuriate in the adult industry for as long as she wants. When she proclaims she projects the girl-next-door image, Sofie isn’t kidding or trying to sell her fans a bill of goods. She really is as she appears on-screen and that, in a business that is turning more and more to the bizarre to keep fans energized, is in itself remarkable.
Think of it this way, Sofie communicates her sexuality without saying, “Hey, look at me!” Her scenes are less about her and more about personalizing the sexual experience for the camera. The more natural she is, the easier it becomes for viewers to imagine themselves in the shoot with her.
As I’ve already hinted, Sofie Marie’s shoots explore sex as a spontaneous expression. In other words she reinforces the idea that sexuality as meaningful on a human level. It’s not a superhero cartoon or the perils of Pauline. It’s just us.
There’s no drool, spit, or slobbering when she is performing orally. Dirty talk is subdued, and, she completely turns the porn formula on its head when she fails (forgets?) to point her toes. Those things are not important in her shoots because they are not her. As Sofie keeps telling us, she’s natural . . . and she is a natural.
I could be wrong and if I ever see her in action on set in a way that disputes what I’ve said here, I’ll let you know.
Not surprisingly, consent is important to Sofie.
“So far I have been treated with respect one hundred percent of the time. I expect nothing else from this industry or I will not shoot with a company who does not respect my time and boundaries,” she proclaims.
For girls to accomplish what Sofie asserts, they must take control of their image just as this statuesque beauty clearly demonstrates in her work. That is a link to feminism she may not know she possesses.
Finally, I had a couple of questions for Sofie that arose from personal interest. She and I are similar in two ways.
First, I was raised in a conservative evangelical home (Southern Baptist) and didn’t know much about sex growing up other than it was sinful outside of marriage.
I don’t know if Sofie’s childhood attitudes were the same, but she had this to say about her background.
“I, too, was raised in a very religious household and I still maintain my spiritual connection to my faith. But I have come to realize that I am a consenting adult and the people I perform with are adults as well and we are not hurting anyone by having sex.”
She concludes with, “I always try to be kind to others.” A lesson we could all share. Are you listening evangelicals?
The other area Sofie and I have in common is endurance sports, specifically triathlon and marathons. The training is grueling and fatiguing and I can’t imagine having sex on camera in addition to that.
So how does she balance everything out?
“My last Ironman was 2016 so my training has been easier for the past year. My husband and I train together, so when we get our schedules synced, we will likely do another one. But my focus is my career now.
“Yes, it’s hard to a balance business and training . . . business is first for now. I do workout with weights and cardio six times a week, just not as long as when I was training for my Ironman!”
We wish her well with all her loves: racing, on-camera sex, and of course, hubby!
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A final note. Sofie Marie did not talk about her fetish performances because regretfully I didn’t ask.
So, for the followers of this blog who like BDSM, I want to assure you Sofie is not shy when the fetish comes her way.
Be sure to follow Sofie’s fetish adventures with your bondage dollars!